Hero Instinct might be a term you’ve heard about or may be you are completely unaware about it but if you are seriously indulged into a relationship with a man then you need to know everything about this. Relationship experts are talking about this new psychological concept to help ladies to make their men fall in love with them and truly commit to them. The psychology is not new, it has always existed, it is just named recently. All the men born with their hero instinct.
Triggering a man’s hero instinct can have extremely amazing consequences for your relationship. Men likes to be recognized and admired. If you can understand the correct way of admiring and appreciating a man’s act, you can thrive your relationship to a deeper level. And if you ignore this simple concept, you may struggle for many years with your relationship issues.
It is very important for a woman to understand the importance of ‘the hero instinct’. How it affects her relationship and what is the best way of application of this psychology to get to a happier state of relationship. You need to have a proper understanding of this male psychology in order to improve your relationship. This radically new concept explains the aspect which really drives a man into any relationship.
This instinct is inherent to every men which is much important than the other external things which drives a man. If you are giving your guy all the privileges and he don’t have to prove his usefulness & heroism to you, that way you are leaving his hero instinct locked and unexplored.
Having a better understanding of this psychology will also help you to have a much deeper understanding of your partner too. That’s what made me to write this article to introduce you to this concept called The Hero Instinct. Only a very few women actually know about this male driver that makes those women way ahead of most other women who are only thinking about money, sex, romance, love, food, sports, etc.
What is The Hero Instinct phrase?
Definitely you are aware of heroes. Hero is a person who is very much dedicated towards someone other or the society. For his good deeds towards them, they feel grateful and give their hero a psychological and social position which is higher than the normal people.
Today we see a lot of movies in which a hero is shown having the best of muscularity, superpowers, saving the people and getting respect in return. The concept of hero instinct is not exactly similar to those filmy heroes but it is based on the inherent manly urges for which they can link and think of themselves as a real hero especially for a woman in their life.
It’s not like making your man feel like a Hollywood hero would do the all work for you and get him closer to you. You need to satisfy his psychological urges of being considered (especially by you) as a special man not lesser than a hero. His hero instinct wants him to be recognized, admired and respected for all of his deeds & efforts which he does for his people especially for his relationship partner.
The hero instinct is a term coined by James Bauer in his bestselling dating book His Secret Obsession. The hero instinct in a man is driven by below mentioned psychological triggers:
- He wants to take care of his loved ones (especially a woman whom he love), provide all the comforts & security he can, love her to his limits and beyond.
- He wants to be recognized, appreciated, respected and loved for all the efforts & acts he does towards his loved ones.
- He wants to be considered for his usability and worth.
You might not take it seriously until you try applying this concept in your relationship. This hero instinct states that a man always wants to be the hero of a women’s life, to whom he love.
Why men needs to feel like heroes?
As I have already said it earlier that this hero instinct is inherent in every man, whether he is aware of it or not. This instinct is away from control of a guy just like his emotions and behavior. As I have discussed it over various points that a guy is compelled to show his affection towards you even if he is not aware about it because he can’t control his emotions and feelings. Same way if a guy likes you but hiding it due to any reason, he will unknowingly express it through his behavior.
It is very much natural and inherent in a guy’s psychology to make you feel protected and to prove himself useful, wanted, essential and trustable. He always wants to be your hero because it is in his psych. And when he feel this emotion for the first time and get a taste of this, it gives him a feeling of satisfaction.
Why is the hero instinct so important?
This hero instinct is very much important for you if you are already in a relationship or wants to be in a relationship with a guy. This doesn’t mean to give undeserving psychological status to your guy. He likes you, he cares for you that’s why he feel insecure and protective of you. It doesn’t mean he see you as a weak person. He just wants to play his role in your life, what he can do for you?
For example, helping you in some work you are capable of doesn’t mean he doubt you capabilities, he know that you can do it alone but still he wants to ease you by helping in any way. If in any way he can ease you or help you or support you, it satisfies his hero instinct by being useful or needed.
You don’t need to get his help in every work everyday. You can take advantage of this male psychology to build a deeper relationship by triggering and satisfying this male biological urge of your man at the right time. Identifying the correct time and choosing the best suitable way to trigger his urges is the key here. Not triggering this important feeling in your guy may make your existence in his life a boring event which may result in he moving away from you.
What guys think of Hero Instinct?
A relationship won’t last long if the man doesn’t feel like the hero of his lady, at least some times if not always. All men wants to be the hero of their girl. If a girl can’t make his guy feel like that, the relationship won’t last long. It doesn’t mean that guys always wants to dominate, some are exceptions, they respect you and your capabilities but they also want you to admire him capabilities and make use of them.
Men respect independent ladies but if you still want your man’s help or enjoy his protection, it’s an honor for him. He likes to feel that way which attracts him towards you. Triggering his hero instinct makes him feel as being trusted by a girl. He thinks like that girl is having expectations from him and that make him try his best to complete all of her expectations. It’s a feeling of usefulness for someone, needed or wanted by someone, being essential for someone. These are the feelings which can encourage anybody in normal life, think yourself what this can do in a relationship where the emotions are already hyped-up.
Hero Instinct Vs Gender Equality
Don’t confuse The Hero Instinct with a male dominated thinking because its not. In today’s time, there is no gender inequality on social as well as political platform but there are some biological & psychological differences exists in males and females. Due to which they feel and think differently. Both are driven differently by different instincts especially when it comes to relationship.
Hero Instinct doesn’t talk about male dominance on females but its all about the different feelings inherited by them for thousands of years. Men wants to protect their female partner and likes to be desired by them. Its an age old factor but still exists. You can take it as an opportunity by making the best use of it by triggering this instinct to attract him towards you.
Not triggering The Hero Instinct of your guy could be a threat to the longevity of your relationship. If all the men has this biological instinct in them then ignoring such an important factor is a foolish behavior. If you doesn’t do anything that triggers his instinct, that may make him feel no special but at par with other males in your life.
If you like some guy, it already means that he is special for you, he is essential in your life and you want him more than the others. You just need to make him feel what you feel about him.
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How do you trigger a guy’s hero instinct?
Now, when you want to secure a healthy and prosperous relationship by triggering your man’s hero instinct but you don’t have villains around you for which you can seek his help. You also can’t admire him for the qualities which are not so special and every other person also used to have them. Then what’s the way?
Believe me, there are many ways available in this modern age which are very much helpful in triggering a man’s hero instinct:
1. Support and encourage him in all his decisions
Supporting and encouraging your guy in various decisions he take and in all the circumstances he face is a good way to trigger his hero instinct. You need to make him feel that he is taking the best decision and you believe him too. It could be anything, related with relationship, his life, carrier, future plans, business decisions, etc.
You also have to support him in his decisions related to his life and interest. For example, if he likes body building and started working out, you need to support his decision not just by appreciating him but also by giving him enough time and space to achieve the body shape he wants to have. You may also help him by suggesting a nice diet. Even if you don’t know anything about exercising, you need to trust his decisions and encourage him for his goals. That creates a genuine and natural comfort to him which make him attract to you and make him love you more.
2. Appreciate his every little success
When you ask for his help or when you support his decisions and he gets the success, you need to appreciate his efforts and celebrate the achievement. Celebrating even a little success is a good way to appreciate one’s efforts. It gives him a feeling of being an achiever and valuable. A couple of claps or hug or kiss or a word of thank in his appreciation is a nice gesture and enough to make him realize that you believed in his capability to succeed.
This is also not a time time thing, you can any time later recall that event and appreciate him about his success. This way triggering his hero instinct would help to flourish the love between you.
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3. Let him know that he make you feel good
In a relationship, a man always try his best to keep his lady comfortable, secure and happy. If you let him know that he is successful in his endeavors to make you feel good, it would be a great satisfaction for his hero instinct psyche. A loving guy would always try to make you feel good, you need to admire his efforts and let him know that he actually makes you feel good. You are with him because you like him and enjoy his company, so be happy around him and make him know that he is the reason of your happiness. You have to express the feelings what you actually feel when he is around you. He wants to make you happy, you just have to let him do it.
4. Challenge him and let him win
Men likes challenges and chasing things. A man take his desired woman as a challenge and likes to chase her and when she comes closer to him, it gives him a satisfaction similar to winning. Similarly, you can try challenging him for some fitness goals and see if he can achieve it. Asking him for some help is also a kind of challenge for him, as he wants to do anything for you and he has to overcome all the hurdles in the way. You need to help him in all the ways, as far as you can, to complete the challenge and accomplish the mission. His hero instinct love challenges because it gives him a chance to prove himself.
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5. Help in boosting his confidence
Another way of triggering a man’s hero instinct is by thriving his confidence. You can boost his confidence time to time by realizing him about his capabilities and abilities. There may be some small qualities which he usually ignore and doesn’t mention in front of others. But by admiring those qualities you can make him feel that you do recognize every details about him as well as consider him as a capable person. Recognition and appreciation automatically boosts confidence which play an important role in feeling like a hero.
6. Show gratitude and respect
It’s very important how you make him feel about himself when you are around him. If he respect you, you should treat him well also when he is with his friends. Don’t make fun of him or criticize him when he is along with his circle. If you find anything he is saying is incorrect, you can correct him in private but don’t belittle or embarrass him anyway.
That behavior of yours would attract the same treatment for you when you are with your buddies. When you treat him respectfully in front of others, he starts to gain respect from others also. Getting respect is also a very important aspect of The Hero Instinct. But you also need to take care that you are not showing over appreciation for small acts, e.g., hugging & kissing him for successfully changing the lightbulb.
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7. Ask for his help and let him feel useful
Whenever you need to fix something that genuinely require other person’s help, you need to ask him first. It could be any issue, related to your work or related with your family. If you ask him first before asking anyone else, it gives him a feeling that you trust him and consider him worthy of solving a problem of your life. That would give him a feeling of being useful and close to you. Asking him first gives an impression that you consider him as a person with the best potential among the people you know.
Everybody wants to be appreciated, whether men or women. You should appreciate his every little effort he does for you. By doing this you can make him feel worthy for you. Recognize the efforts he does for you. Always ask for his help in the matters suitable to a man, e.g., troubleshooting a car breakdown, shifting some heavy objects, etc.
Even if you are stuck with a problem at work or life and you need a genuine advice, you may ask him. This would make him realize that you trust his decision making. He’ll ultimately feel valued and needed. That will trigger the inner hero in the guy. If you don’t ask him for any help and try to do everything independently, it gives him a feeling of being left out. But it doesn’t mean you ask his help for everything.
8. Make him feel special
It is one of the best way to trigger a man’s hero instinct by making him feel he is special than others. As you like him much and you will agree that he has a very special status in your life which nobody else can ever get. You need to make him realize about how much his presence matter in your life. You can do it through your gestures and behavior. Simply telling him about your feelings is the simplest and most effective way.
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9. Tell him that you enjoy his company
Let him know that you enjoy his appearance around you. You don’t have to fake anything here, you like him and enjoy his company very much. So, just let him know this. Try to take interest in the things he likes to do, you may not like them first but give it a chance. He would definitely admire your efforts and imagine if you find those things enjoying then you both have another new thing in common to talk or play around.
How Hero Instinct affect your relationship?
As I have mentioned that The Hero Instinct is inherent in a man. If you are able to trigger that instinct of you guy, you will start observing a positive difference in your relationship. Above mentioned tips are the proven ways to trigger the hero in your man. You will see him as a more protective and caring person. He will feel more powerful, admired and respected. He would feel more confident and satisfied which will lead him to be more loving and kind towards you. All these things are a must factor of a loving and long lasting relationship.
What Is The Hero Instinct 12 Words?
The hero instinct 12 words is a list of things that you can say to your guy to trigger his hero instinct. These phrases have been tested on many guys and have been proven to trigger his hero instinct.
What is the secret obsession to a man’s heart?
The secret obsession to a man’s heart is to allowing him to be the person he always wants to be. This is something he is secretly obsessed about knowingly or unknowingly. Help him to satisfy his inner hero instincts. Men tends to get attracted towards the relationship where they see a scope of satisfying their inner manly urges. Every man has a secret obsession. If you succeed in finding out your man’s inner happiness, it would transform your relationship radically.
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